Coming Home

As the last of the troops come home from Iraq, I have been thinking a lot about the Iraq war and the impact it has had... on the world, on the Iraqi people, on the military, on our family, and on my husband (who also happens to be my hero, by the way). We all know there is plenty of debate surrounding our country's involvement over there, and I don't want to get into that... we've heard it all before. That's not to say, however, that we should ignore the issues surrounding our involvement there. It's important to learn from past experience. But, I hope that all the debate and division regarding Iraq will not be the only memory people have of our years there.

I hope that people will remember that although the troops are home, it is not over. It is not over for many of the troops and it is not over for the people of Iraq. The injured and the families of the fallen still carry this war with them everyday.

I hope that people remember that while the rest of the world may have been obsessed with politics, most of the troops were just trying to do their part to turn a bad situation into something good... or at least not so bad, and to keep each other and innocent Iraqis safe. Hub's deployment was during a time when the violence in Iraq was really bad, right before the troop surge. It was all over the news with constant debates about pulling the troops out, or adding more. While he was there, people often asked me what he thought about our involvement there. When I'd ask hub that question, he'd say, "Whether or not we should have come in the first place, it's a good thing we're here now."

Most of all, I hope that people will remember that America is still good, that most people all over the world are still good, and that war isn't. But sometimes, there are reasons why we should fight, and it's good to know that there are still people out there who are willing to sacrifice to preserve what is good. In fact, I think that most people are willing to do that, given the right circumstances. In an ideal world, we would only go to war for the right reasons. We don't live in an ideal world, but I hope that people will still remember to believe in the potential of humanity.

As I was trying to figure out how to put my feelings about all of this into words, I remembered a song that hub listened to while he was over there. It think it does a great job of capturing the spirit of sacrifice that I hope will not be forgotten... and the feeling that we are all in this together.

Sandstorm in Iraq.

I will drink the cup, the poison overflowing.

I will lift you up, watch over where you're going.

The first one in, the last one gone.

I'll be the rock to stand upon.

For you.

Hub in Iraq.

My spirit aches and I can't stop this river flowing.

In fear I take each labored breath I draw in knowing

That this could be my last, my final hour.

But faith and hope and love give me the power...

Together at last!

For you.

Visiting the grave of Hub's friend.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil for you are with me.

You are with me.

I'll be your salvation, though the storm's surrounding.

There on our own conditions, lay my body down. 

In the wake abandon willing sacrifice.

I'll walk through the canyon, bring the shadows life.

For you.

Song lyrics: For You from the We Were Soldiers soundtrack.
By the way, Johnny Cash and Dave Matthews sing the song together. Can't go wrong with Johnny Cash. :)

Heroes

I just heard a song. I hadn't heard it in a long time, but as I was driving in the car with the kids, listening to the lyrics, the tears started flowing. It was Tim McGraw singing If You're Reading This. My thoughts were with a Marine wife who's husband was killed in Afghanistan two months ago. She and her baby girl have been in my thoughts and prayers since I heard about their loss. I've been reading her blog, and my heart breaks for her. But I am in awe of her courage and positive attitude.

She is one of many who've lost their loved ones to war. Those who are left behind when a loved one is lost, who carry on, and live to honor their fallen hero, are also heroes. Thankfully, I have no way of knowing just how much despair washes over one who suffers this trial. Or how much courage and strength it takes to move forward, but I am full of respect, admiration and gratitude for those heroes, both the fallen and the ones left to carry on.

I only know what it felt like when the Man was in Iraq, and I regularly recieved emails about the loss of soldiers in his brigade. My heart broke for their loved ones. Every time. I only know what it felt like when I heard the sadness and the tears in the Man's voice when he called to tell me that his friend had been killed - shot by a sniper. I wished so much that I could hold the Man in my arms and let him cry into my hair. And my heart broke again for his friend's wife and son. I only know how I felt one night when I hadn't heard from the Man for awhile, and I was starting to worry a little. I was sitting in front of my laptop, reading the news that six soldiers from his brigade had been killed (their names were not being released, pending notification of their next of kin), when there was a knock at the door. It was late, and I couldn't imagine who would be knocking at the door, but half a second later, I did imagine one possibility and I wished nobody had knocked. I walked to the door, opened it, and finally breathed when I saw two teenage boys from the neighborhood standing there. They handed me a flyer about a lawn care business they were starting. They had no idea of the roller-coaster ride my heart had just taken.

But that was nothing.

Nothing compared to the ultimate sacrifice that others have made. Nothing compared to what others are going through right now. I have been thinking about the many mothers, fathers, wives, husbands, children, and friends who've made this sacrifice.

If you want to read more about one of these heroes, check out Mrs. P's blog and the article that she just wrote for the Washington Post. There is also a very moving video about Cpl. Jonathan D. Porto's escort home.

My words are so inadequate, and I know that I can't even imagine what it really feels like to give up so much, so I just want to say Thank You to those who have, and explain that those two words also carry all the sincere thoughts that I don't know how to express.